Can You Say I’m Sorry

Remember the other day…I posted a story about a lawyer who got butt-hurt because he posted some unattributed material on his website and got caught by the original authors?

Well, this particular lawyer, who denigrated some other very successful lawyers, doesn’t think the internet is very important to his business. He has just found out that he was sadly mistaken. Here is the continuing saga of a Dallas, Texas Attorney as told by the proprietor of the Simple Justice law blog.

A few excerpts:

I can hear what’s running through your head all the way up here in New York.

So you screwed up.  You played in a sandbox you thought you understood. You hired some slimebags to create and manage an online presence in order to market your way to prominence, and left them to do their job. They did, and did it in a way that blew up in your face.

You don’t think of yourself as a bad guy. You think you’re pretty good. Maybe even better than pretty good, even if others don’t appreciate you yet.  Why would anybody try to beat up on a good guy like you?  Why are other people so mean, so angry, that they would go after you as if you told them their baby was ugly or ran over their dog?

It was no big deal.  You didn’t care. It was just some fluff that the guys in Bangalore put on your website to fill the empty white space.  It wasn’t Moby Dick, for crying out loud. You don’t see why it’s a problem to begin with, and you certainly don’t see why it’s a big enough problem for anybody to make a hullaballoo about.  They need to get a life. You have one, in court. That’s where lawyers spend their days. And you’re a lawyer. A L-A-W-Y-E-R, and they must be losers to spend their days worrying about what guys in Bangalore do instead of being more like you.

One attorney from a successful law firm, feeling sorry for the guy tried to reach out and give some good, but  unsolicited advise, and was spurned like a jilted lover left at the altar with family and friends waiting for the great moment to happen.

I mean, what the hell, comedians steal jokes from each other all the time and they don’t get all bent out of shape about it, amirite?

What we do not do, what we never do, is let the clients know about the con. Like a magician doesn’t tell how another magician does a trick, a lawyer doesn’t tell how another lawyer did wrong. We don’t do that.

What we do is write praise for each other on the internet. We pay the guys in Bangalore to write something nice for another lawyer, and they have their guys in Bangalore write something nice about us. We all benefit from the game. So what if its all a big lie. This is the internet. This is how we market ourselves. That’s what being a lawyer is all about.

You’re thinking, if you have a problem with me, then you owe it to me to talk to me first. You have no right, none, to screw with my practice, my carefully crafted and expensive internet marketing scheme, without being man enough to come to me. How dare you just call me out? You’re a coward and an asshole. Real men do what I want them to do.  No real man would screw with another guy’s marketing scheme without talking to them, man to man, first.

If your practice involves borrowing stealing material from others and posting it on your blog like it was yours, then yes, someone needs to bring you to task for your egregious dumbassness. ( A word I just made up, feel free to use it without attribution.)

I am not a lawyer, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night, so that makes me smart enough to know that a relatively inexperienced attorney doesn’t butt heads with other attorneys who have vastly way more experience, that try to tell you that you’ve dug yourself into a very deep hole and to quit before you dig any deeper.

Here’s Simple Justice’s advise to the a fore mentioned Texas attorney:

Dear Carl,

It reaches a point where the hole is so deep that I begin to feel badly about it. As criminal defense lawyers, we are all about redemption, learning a lesson and walking away from the hole.  Sure, what’s happened has happened, and in your case, reflects an ignorance so palpable as to be deeply disturbing, but that doesn’t mean you can’t wake up this morning, recognize that you’ve made a terrible mistake and try your best to fix it.

That’s what real men do, Carl.

This is about you, but it’s about much more than you. You have made yourself a prime example for the many lawyers who don’t realize that the practice of law isn’t a con, that the internet isn’t an ethics-free zone.  From your mistakes, others will learn. Maybe your conduct will save other lawyers. Hopefully, it will save clients who might otherwise fall for the con.

Whether you can be saved, Carl, is entirely up to you. It always has been. Nobody woke up this morning thinking of ways to hurt Carl David Ceder.  And nobody has hurt Carl David Ceder more than you.  You can stop it at any time.  It begins with the word “sorry.”


Very sage advice Carl. You would do yourself a great service if you carefully heeded Mr. SHG’s admonishment. Not only have you dug a very deep hole, but you have also invoked the dreaded “Streisand Effect.”

Anyway, good luck Mr. Texas Attorney, you’re going to need it.



2 thoughts on “Can You Say I’m Sorry

  1. Pingback: WTF? Vermont Mom Held in Psych Ward Against Her Will | Regular Right Guy

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